And I think, OK. So a dog isn’t the most important thing. But a dog like Honey loves one person completely, unwaveringly, with perfect faith. That has to be more important than most things.
And Gabriel, I say. He has Gabriel too. Gil says nothing but I know the answer. The answer is that Gabriel can’t save Mathew any more than Gil can, or Honey. Or Jake. But we are all woven together, like a piece of cloth, and we all support each other, for better or worse. Gabriel is just a baby but eventually he will see the world and his father as they are: imperfect, dangerous, peppered with betrayals and also with love.
I cannot think about these things any longer. I droop against Gil and inhale the familiar scent of him, and he puts his arm around my shoulders and tells me to go to sleep now, not to worry about anything.
the world will trundle along, he says, and kisses the top of my head. Despite us thinking it must grind to a halt. The world has seen worse than us, Perguntadora. It is not so easily shocked.
I rest against him, aware of how tightly we are bound together, through thick and thin. For the moment I have stopped thinking of a time when we will no longer have each other. Marieka was right to tell me to take care of Gil. He and I will watch over one another as long as we are alive, and Marieka will watch over us both, each of us according to our capacity for care. I will not always be happy, but perhaps, if I`m lucky, I will be spared the agony of adding pain to the world.
And then I close my eyes and drift off to the great white noise of the engines, dreaming of a future I know nothing about.